What does masculinity really mean? 

YES Institute was recently asked to facilitate a conversation at the Young Men’s Preparatory Academy with an in-depth look at masculinity. Participants ranged from middle to high school students and attended the dialogue in a large assembly. TJ, Education & Inclusion Specialist, reflected on the dialogue saying, “We’re here to create a safe space and yet it wasn’t safe enough for them to be vulnerable with each other.” One student was nervous about opening up to the entire school and mentioned that to our team. He also shared, “I don’t want to be an Alpha [male], but I don’t know how not to be that.” 

Some of the young men felt comfortable going up to TJ and opening up about their own personal experiences with masculinity. A few of them mentioned that sharing emotions was a sign of weakness even though they desperately wanted to open up. They also shared that discussing their mental and emotional health is incredibly taboo and frowned upon. Being tough, angry, and sometimes violent was far more accepted than crying as the students reminded our team of the old adage, “boys don’t cry.” 

In-depth inquiry in our dialogues uncovers the correlation between the stigma of mental health and mass shootings through the lens of gender, specifically masculinity. According to the Violence Project, 98% of mass shooters over the last 50 years have been men, and at least 53% of them have been white men. 

“We as a society have to work to redefine what masculinity is in order to see a change.” – a Miami-Dade County Public School (MDCPS) Teacher

Last fall YES Institute led dialogues on masculinity in many school communities, including MDCPS teachers, counselors, and administrators. These conversations allow staff to question how they relate to their students, with regards to what they expect of their students based on gender. One of the teachers shared that they learned how to better support their male students emotionally in ways they hadn’t considered before. Another counselor expressed the impact of male expectations weighing on their students in and out of the classroom. As one of the MDCPS teachers reflected, “I learned that masculinity is ever evolving and the focus needs to move away from toxic masculinity and focus more towards positive masculinity.” 

Join our Masculinity Distinguished course on Feb 25, 2023 at 9am ET on zoom.