Families

Name: I got called ‘faggot’ at 7 years old
Rating: 5

Families often experience pain and confusion when a young person comes out as gay or transgender, or expresses gender in unexpected ways. Many questions feel urgent: Is this just a phase they will outgrow? Will they be safe? Did I do something wrong? What will people think of me/us? How do I tell the rest of the family?

YES Institute provides education and resources that support families grappling with these questions. Our Communication Solutions™ course, in particular, is effective in giving families a way to move past seemingly intractable battles over right/wrong. No one must give up their deeply-held beliefs for youth to stay safe and families to remain whole.

If you are looking for educational resources for you or your family, please contact us.

I got called 'faggot' at 7 years old. Some people still call me that. Making fun of someone for who they are or who they like is not okay. –Broward Middle School student

I learned that just because you are a girl does not mean you can’t do what boys can do.

4th Grade Student

In 30 years of teaching, I’ve never had any training around these topics, and it’s so relevant to what we see in our classrooms.

Early Learning Coalition of Miami-Dade/Monroe Training participant

Taking Communications Solutions™ provided me with an entirely new approach to conflict resolution. It taught me not to collapse “having a voice” with combative aggression. I have faith that my internship with YES Institute will provide me with the opportunities to live and communicate authentically.

Fall 2018 high school Intern

Very applicable to my practice—up-to-date research, policies, and language that will allow me to better serve my patients. –Clinical therapist

Exceeded my expectations! It got me looking at the language I use so I can avoid setting harmful stereotypes for youth.

Early Learning Coalition Miami-Dade/Monroe training participant

I learned that bullying can be a form of communication. I learned how youth might be copying what they see from their parents, and other adults. I learned that we can all make a contribution to stop it.

A Communication Called "Bullying" course participant

The difference was hearing directly from a person about their struggles, not just reading about it.

Participant in the Judges College, Naples, FL.

I learned so much today. I’ll admit I felt uncomfortable with transgender people before, and now I feel inspired to be the support system for ALL my students.

Teach For America corps member

I’m not out to my parents. I think they would kick me out because they’ve voiced that it is not okay. School is my only safe place.

Hialeah High School student

One of the things I learned was how early in a child’s development is the realization of who they are and how crucial my support is for them to be their authentic self.

Licensed Clinical Social Worker

I learned new skills to be able to talk to parents when their little girl wants to play with trucks and LEGO toys instead of dolls and the kitchen set.

Early Childhood Teacher

I haven’t told my father that I’m gay because I’m afraid of his reaction, but now I see that we don’t have to agree for us to live in harmony.

High School Student

I’ve never seen an approach like this to these topics. Now I can support staff so they can help these youth develop their voices.

Participant at the University of Maryland, Baltimore - National Training Institutes

The educational work of YES Institute is unparalleled to any other organization I know, locally or nationally. I feel lucky that our students have this precious opportunity of open dialogue and learning on the topics of gender and orientation.

University of Miami, Women & Gender Studies Professor

I am accepting, but I need to learn more. Today I learned that it’s okay to ask questions when I don’t know.

Participant in dialogue at Temple Judea

I was always ready to jump down my dad’s throat because he is homophobic. I now see that he is probably worried about me, and I don’t need to change his mind for us to live in harmony.

17-year-old

Our employees expect us to provide an open culture where diversity of people and opinions is valued. YES Institute's training has paved the way for leadership in this area.

Hal Marshall, Sapient Razorfish People Strategy Team

Every time I take this course I learn something new. This course helped me reflect on my personal life and how I can better the communication within my own family.

Marti Stein, Communication Solutions™ participant

I see the urgency of being proactive in creating safe environments. Students may be struggling in silence, and they cannot concentrate on school if they don't feel safe.

Middle school teacher

YES Institute has saved my family. It's because of YES Institute that we now have the ability to really listen to each other, inspire healing, seek education, and build a safe and comfortable home.

Jenny Betancourt Graduate Student

This dialogue redefined my definition of feminity and masculinity and made me feel more secure about being more of a tomboy.

16 Year Old High School Student

Motivates me to engage more with my son’s school on gender and orientation issues. Bullying is prevalent.

Museum staff member

Completely changed my perspective and made me aware of derogatory terms I may be using unintentionally.

Teacher, Palmer Trinity School

I see the urgency of being proactive. Students may be struggling in silence, and they cannot concentrate on school if they don’t feel safe.”  
–Miami-Dade Middle School teacher

People bully my brother because he cries sometimes. I even bully him. I learned how bullying can really change someone’s life.

Nova Southeastern University Middle School Student

In 30 years of teaching, I’ve never had any training around these topics, and it’s so relevant to what we see in our classrooms.

Early Childhood Teacher

I got called ‘faggot’ at seven years old. Some people still call me that. Making fun of someone for who they are or who they like is not okay.

Nova Southeastern University Middle School Student

Opened my heart in a way I didn’t think possible. Now I can initiate a conversation with my mom, even though I’m afraid.

College Student

Not everything has to be a battle. Instead of being in a toxic cycle, I can use the new model of communication to speak with others.

Ross, high school student

It’s important for my students to stop and examine the impact of gender and orientation. It’s easy to forget about the real world from the comforts of the classroom.

Miami-Dade College Professor

Before this course, I could not bear to talk about my family out of fear of what people might think. I felt as if I was losing my child. Now I am able to hear my 15-year-old and truly be proud of my transgender son.

Parent of transgender son

I never considered that I can be a lifeline for students who don’t feel accepted. I will make sure I don’t impose my beliefs of how girls and boys ‘should’ act.

Middle school teacher

Before today I felt only confusion or frustration towards gay and transgender people. Now I feel compassion.

Human Resources Manager, University of Miami

I am a boy who likes theater and I am assumed to be gay just because of that. Sometimes it really bothers me.

Nova Southeastern University Middle School Student

I am tired of tripping over my words with gay and transgender patients. Now I feel much more capable to relate to all my patients with respect.

Physician, Citrus Health Network

Working with YES Institute has allowed us to enhance the quality of services we provide to all members of our community. Through educational sessions, staff has gained valuable knowledge and skills. We look forward to further collaboration.

Carmen Cantero, Quality Improvement & Compliance Officer, Citrus Health Network

I haven't stepped up to this conversation because I don't want to be portrayed as an activist judge. I see now, I am being an activist judge by denying these rights.

- Participant from the Judicial College, Naples, FL.

I have been shut down by my colleagues on even starting conversations about gay youth. This is the way to make true change and keep all young people safe.

Participant at the University of Maryland, Baltimore - National Training Institutes

Powerful- great insight into the impact of language and my responsibility in perpetuating ‘bullying’ culture.

Debbie Rodriguez

This is an organization with a track record of making a real difference in the world. Political victories mean little if the hearts and minds of parents, clergy, and teachers do not change.

Jonathan Lewis Member of YES Institute's Kiaora Society of Donors

I learned that people are bullied and targeted based on their gender expression. Not their orientation. I've never thought of that before.

A.D. Henderson High School Student

I learned that being yourself is not a problem and that everyone likes different things.

Nova Southeastern University Middle School Student

Authenticity brings freedom. This course allowed me to be myself and open up more. It made me realize that I am valuable.

Michael, high school student

Gay and trans youth have come to our doors because they had nowhere else to go. We clearly see the need for education.

Participant in dialogue at Temple Judea

Before today, I felt all alone. Thank you for providing us with tools to address ‘antigay’ slurs and helping us to become better people!

High school student, Archimedean Academy

After taking the course, A Communication Called "Bullying" I plan to begin addressing these topics in our school and community with the various stakeholders including, but not limited to teachers, administrators, support personnel, parents, community leaders and students.

Avis Feldman, Miami-Dade County School Teacher

When I come to YES Institute, I get the rare opportunity to think, investigate and come up with ideas that will actually make a difference.

Barbara Chotiner MDCPS Teacher

The material made me look at these topics in a new way. It opened my eyes to how gender and orientation show up in medicine. Before today, it was invisible to me.

Medical student Phi Delta Epsilon Medical Fraternity

By far the most candid conversation I have ever had on these topics. The information was authentic and anecdotal, which highlighted easy things I can do to make it safe for my patients.

Phi Delta Epsilon Medical Fraternity International Convention

Changed my life! I feel like—for the first time—I’m seeing people for who they are. This will help save some important relationships.

Social Worker

Now I see how being confrontational actually prevents me from making any positive difference.

Parent

I was worried, and it tested my relationship with God, but I know that she’s still my daughter—the same person she’s always been—and I’m very proud of her.

Efrain Sora, Father of Roxy-Cary Sora

We are coming out of this conversation with concrete actions to expand understanding and increase capacity of judges, lawyers, and litigants. Fantastic!

Participant in the Judges College, Naples, FL

I learned new skills to be able to talk to parents when their little girl wants to play with trucks and LEGO toys instead of dolls and the kitchen set.

Early Learning Coalition of Miami-Dade/Monroe Training participant

Loved it! I will take these tools back to my agency and the schools where we work. I see how we can take action even though we may disagree.

Participant at the University of Maryland, Baltimore - National Training Institutes

I’ve had these conversations before, but they’ve always been politicized, which made me feel attacked. Thank you for opening my eyes to the importance of providing the best care for everyone!

Phi Delta Epsilon Medical Fraternity International Convention

After the YES Institute dialogue, I now feel more knowledgeable to support my clients and families.

Staff, Center for Autism & Related Disabilities

It doesn’t matter if you’re a boy or a girl, what matters is what’s on the inside. –5-year-old

Before today I only saw two solutions to arguments: either we agree, or I ‘prove my point.’ Now I can open space for real conversations and relationships.

Amanda, teacher

Gender is so much more than anatomy. Now I am empowered to listen to our patients and ask questions if I am not sure what the answer is.

University of Miami, Physical Therapy Undergraduate Student

<< Prev

Next >>